Has anyone watched the teaser movie trailer for the Twilight sequel New Moon? The teaser trailer is garbage. Absolute garbage. It looks like some kind of commercial for a TV movie, with the sappy romantic stuff at the beginning and the cheesy werewolf at the end. (more…)

I watched Twilight when it came to theaters. It was surprisingly pretty good, even though it was focused more on the hormones of a teenage girl than on anything more macro such as good versus evil or protagonist versus antagonist (though one would argue that the complexities of a woman cannot be topped).

Following that, I went on to read all four of the Twilight books by Stephenie Meyer. I had heard they were good, so I was willing to give them a chance. The first book was good and quite entertaining, as Bella attempted to discover what the mystery was behind Edward. The second book, however, was just OK.

New Moon, which is hastily being made into a movie this year, is not going to make much of a movie at all. The first half of the book is pretty good, as Bella starts up a quasi-relationship with Jacob, her soon-to-be-werewolf best friend. In reality, the book is just a retread of the first one, only with a werewolf in place of a vampire. Bella sure knows how to pick them, doesn’t she? It’s entertaining, but when it devolves into a race to save Edward from the Volturi, it takes a turn for the worse. Meyer ends the book with absolutely no action, and in fact there is only one suspenseful moment in the entire novel. How will this become a good movie? It’s hard to imagine.

Thankfully, Eclipse is a much-better book. Victoria, who has been lurking in the shadows since the first novel, amasses a vampire army to take down the Cullens and kill Bella. The result? A vampire vs. vampire vs. werewolf battle, which, if done right, should be amazing on the silver screen. Eclipse is exciting, smart and entertaining, and will make a perfect finish to the trilogy.

Except… the series doesn’t end as a trilogy. It ends with Breaking Dawn, a shockingly disappointing finish that takes the characters in unwanted directions. Bella finally gets to screw Edward, but not until he’s convinced her to marry at a young age (is this meant to teach young girls a moral lesson? It’s not “don’t have sex until you’re married.” It’s “if you want to have sex, get married so you can have sex.”). Then she gets knocked up, and spends much of the rest of the book lying around on her death bed, so much so that Meyer has to shift the narrative to Jacob to progress the story. Ouch. Eventually, Bella becomes a vampire, and this is the best thing that happens to her: however, how can you top being immortal and wanting to eat other humans?  Of course, Bella doesn’t get to suffer any of the consequences, as her father shrugs off her conversion with minimal conflict (that’s convenient) and she doesn’t have any of the urges a newborn vampire should have.

To cap it all off, Meyer sets up a gigantic battle between the Cullens and the Volturi, and then decides not to have a satisfying finale at all. Harry Potter, the Twilight series is not.

Essentially, the Twilight series is an entertaining series that doesn’t have a plot or much else. Unlike Harry Potter, which carefully and intelligently progresses its stories along to a massive, satisfying climax, Meyer seems more concerned about fitting her frustratingly annoying lead character into a childhood dream of immortality and endless love. The books aren’t bad, but they are overrated, and it’s sad that any young girl may idolize Bella. Bella is annoying, and her attempts to be selfless generally results in her being as selfish as possible. Driven by hormones and a silly, youthful love, she is willing to give up everything, including her family and friends, for her lover. That’s just pathetic.

The only reason I’m dwelling on the moral aspects of the story is because I’m disappointed by the general story arc of the books. They’re written by a woman for girls – and I am neither a woman nor a girl – so I understand that I’m not in the target audience. But when you write a story about vampires and werewolves and don’t follow through with such things… well, it’s embarrassing that this series is compared to Harry Potter.

I’ve been on a reading tear. Since the beginning of the year, I’ve read at least five books, three of them from the hugely successful Stephenie Meyer Twilight franchise. Not having a huge respect for the Mormon religion, I was impressed with the relative depth of the first book. Having already seen the movie, it was well-written and entertaining – if not lacking just a bit in the suspense department.

The second book, New Moon, I did not like so much. It pretty much was a rehash of the first one, only with even less excitement. The development of Jacob’s character was good, but the book just fizzled in the end.

Much excitement has been made, however, for the casting of Jane in New Moon. Jane, who did not appear in the first book or movie, is a part of the royal vampire family in Italy. She is described as petite, blonde and angelic; she also tends to do the family’s dirty work and has a special power: inflicting torture. In Eclipse (which is excellent, by the way), Jane shows up at the end, and I’m guessing that she may play a bigger part in the finale, which I’m just beginning to read.

Director Chris Weitz has stated that Dakota Fanning is in the running for the role, and apparently offered her the part, no audition required. Fanning, a petite, blonde and angelic 14-year old, could certainly play the part. She has shied away from kiddie parts even as a little girl, and is known for acting older than her age – almost to a creepy degree. Thus, her general acting approach would work perfectly for the character of Jane.

As Fanning said herself, “It’s definitely possible. I really hope it works out. It would be a really fantastic experience I’m sure.”

The box office pundits can stop guessing, at least somewhat. After a $7 million Friday, analysts still weren’t sure what to make of Twilight as it moved into the weekend. How many of the film’s fans flocked to the midnight showings? Would they still show up in force over the rest of the weekend?

With Friday results in, those questions still linger, but it is clear that Twilight, a movie with a purported $37 million budget, could make as much as $70 million this weekend. Counting the midnight showings, Twilight made $33 million on Friday, a massive intake – especially for a low-budget film. This opening, powered by teenage girls, is absolutely stunning though not completely surprising, considering the fan buzz around the film that has mounted in the past few weeks. I’d say the expectation is that Saturday and Sunday won’t fare as well, as those who really wanted to see the movie Thursday night probably went to go see it on Friday, but even with a low multiplier for the rest of the weekend, the film is in good shape.

Next week will be even more interesting. Given that it’s Thanksgiving weekend, Twilight has the chance to remain huge, but will the fans that poured out this week return for multiple viewings? It’s hard to tell. The weekend essentially gives teenagers four days in a row off, and many families that didn’t want to fight the masses may show up then. Curious non-fans like myself may also turn out, though the mixed reviews may have scared some people into waiting for DVD. Still, Twilight is a blockbuster, and there won’t be a lot of competition all the way until December 12th.

As for the other big movies this weekend, Bolt looks to be shooting for a $27 million weekend, having taken in $7.1 on Friday. This is pretty disappointing for the Disney movie, especially given its moderately good reviews, and you have to wonder just how much tension there is between the Pixar guys, who produce the truly high-quality, high-revenue pictures and the “regular” Disney crew, who just don’t.

Quantum of Solace took in $8.7 on Friday, and should also end up with about $27 million for the weekend. This precipitous drop had to be expected, though one has to ask how much higher the result would have been had word-of-mouth been better. I for one usually go see James Bond movies two or three times in theaters, but my only interest in seeing this one again is to watch it with lessened expectations.

It may be nothing… or it may be something. Twilight, only a couple months before its release, has returned some of its actors to shooting new scenes.

Peter Facinelli (Carlisle Cullen in the movie) told MTV that there’s nothing wrong with the current film, but that executives were so delighted with the wrapped film that they opted to make some more of it; in other words, make the film everybody is waiting for.  “They liked it so much, they are bringing us back for some encore time to beef it up. Add a little salt and pepper.”

That’s ominous, in my opinion. If the executives liked it so much, why add more to it? It’s not completely ridiculous – perhaps the movie is so good that the executives approved additional budget to film scenes that were originally cut – but highly unlikely. And when I hear quotes like the one provided above, it sounds like major PR spin bullshit.

Here’s some more from Facinelli:

“I wouldn’t be walking tomorrow if I spilled those beans, but I’m psyched, especially about the wardrobe. I can tell you that it’s a flashback scene. It gives us a little bit of history of the Cullen family. They are just shooting a couple of different added scenes, and the scene I’m in, I can tell you it’s me and Robert Pattinson. Rosalie and Emmett are in that scene.”

And from Taylor Lautner (Jacob Black in the film): “I am going to be in the prom scene now, at the very end of the film. At first we didn’t film that, and now some people are saying they want to see a bit more of Jacob, and they want him in the prom scene at the end.”

In the devastating hole left by the retreat of Harry Potter and the Half-Blood Prince, Disney’s Bolt and Summit’s Twilight have moved into feast on the potential box office dollars left behind. The movies – both of which aim at younger audiences (Bolt at considerably younger) – had been staying clear of the coveted November 21 release date out of respect – or -fear of the sixth Harry Potter flick. With announcement that that highly anticipated film was being pushed back to summer 2009, the coveted date was scooped up by the two films, which now look to take advantage of Thanksgiving weekend to earn some extra dough.

This is a good opportunity for Twilight, which is based on an allegedly popular book series about a normal girl (the gorgeous Kristin Stewart) who likes to screw around with vampires. OK, to be fair, she’s monogamous and prefers to share her time with just one vampire (Robert Pattison, who actually lays claim to being the first profound death in the Harry Potter franchise), but you get the point. There’s certainly some buzz around the picture, but having known nothing about the story other than what Summit’s marketing reps tell me, I don’t really see the big deal.

Personally, I don’t think Twilight is going to be the massive picture that some expect it to be. It’s definitely going to get a boost from the Thanksgiving weekend, but is it going to be a valid replacement for Harry Potter? No. The “franchise” doesn’t have the same name recognition that made Harry Potter so successful, and while it looks decent, it doesn’t look that much different than a dozen other teeny bopper horror movies that have come before it. General audiences aren’t going to be that motivated to go see this one, except for a lack of other entertainment.

Only time shall tell.

Watch the new teaser trailer for the upcoming movie Twilight. For a teen action-horror, it looks pretty good… then again, it still comes off as teen action-horror. The line, “I’m only afraid of losing you,” while not bad, does not exactly escalate the film above teen drama.